| Hey, hey, my friends!
How are you? Really, how are you?
Are you glad that it is Monday, or are you anxious or depressed?
I just returned from a weeklong vacation from Huntington Beach, California, and it was amazing! Why?
Because for the first time in my life, I was able to let go of work and responsibility and actually enjoy myself! What a concept, huh? It sounds really simple conceptually . . .
UNLESS:
You’re a PERFECTIONIST like me!
I have always known that I possess perfectionistic tendencies, but, until recently, I had no idea just how much it was dominating my life and making me miserable. I have been reading a life-changing book called The Great Pain Deception by Steven Ray Ozanich. The best way that I can describe this book is to say that you don’t read it; you experience it!
So, if you have perfectionistic tendencies, and you also have bodily pain, I highly recommend it! Here is a link: https://amzn.to/2q2nMhI
Now back to YOU . . .
If you are a perfectionist, I have a challenge for you this week! If you are on spring break, maybe you should try it next week when you are back in the “real world.”
Okay, here is the challenge:
-Be aware of when you become stressed or anxious
-Ask yourself: Where is my stress coming from? I want you to be crystal clear about your source of stress
-Now notice your breathing. Is it shallow? Are you FULLY inhaling and exhaling, or are you cutting your breath off? If you are truly stressed, you will notice that your breathing will be short, incomplete, and hurried.
-Know this: Your breathing is a reflection of your emotional wellbeing. If you are taking long full breaths, you can be sure that you are feeling okay. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true.
-What expectations do you currently have of yourself? Are they too low, too high? Tip: If you are a perfectionist, you won’t think that you have high enough expectations of yourself even though they are likely through the friggin’ roof!
-Now the most important question of the day: “Am I satisfied with myself, and do I feel like I am ENOUGH?”
These questions are designed to pull you into the present moment and allow that perfectionist mind of yours to gain some refreshing perspective.
The Last Word
If you are a perfectionist, you have likely prided yourself on it and boldly proclaimed it. Society hails the perfectionist, and we are quick to point out all of their good qualities.
But what about the bad qualities? I think it is time to give them their just dues too!
And the best way to do it?
Live your life in the MOMENT! Anxiety comes from constantly projecting into the future, and depression comes from drawing upon the past. When you ask the previous questions and focus on taking deep, full, and relaxing breaths, it forces you to pull your mind back into the present moment.
This is called “being present,” and it is one of the most overlooked elements of true health and wellness. And BTW, being present is EXTREMELY DIFFICULT for a true perfectionist.
When I was on vacation, it occurred to me that I was enjoying myself because I was being present. In other words, I was NOT thinking about work, finances, or any other of the infinite past or future topics that I could be thinking about. It was AWESOME, and I plan on doing much more of it! 🙂
I have a LONG way to go on this, and I am far from perfect (which really pisses the perfectionist side of me off, ha, ha!), but I am working on my breathing and being present and focusing on the NOW!
Thank you for sticking with me on this long email. I really hope that it helps you to be a little easier on yourself. Remember, it’s okay not to be perfect! That is what we human beings do best!
Life is Good!
Griff |
